Clarification

Let me make this absolutely crystal clear for those of you who may have misunderstood anything I have ever said about my sorority or the Greek system in general: I have never been ashamed to be an Alpha Delta Pi, nor part of the Greek community as a whole. There were times when I was frustrated by things I saw going on within my chapter, but over all I have never regretted joining. I have made some really good friends and though I am now alum and we do not see each other as often because of conflicting schedules, I still feel I can call up some of these women at any time just to chat and things would be as usual. I am so happy for ADPi and what looks like a great Alpha class for this fall, though I have yet to meet them. Whatever was done for Recruitment this year worked out amazingly well and I am glad to see that in the future, should my daughters want to join Alpha Delta Pi, there may be a place for them here at UNL. However, I am also very happy to see some of the changes coming in just a few short months and I think the chapter will be a lot better off for it. These specifics changes make me wish I was still Active, because things are only going to get better and ADPi is still the best sorority around!

Lions and violets and diamonds, oh my!

Tonight we (the other seniors in the house and I) are having a quick get-together with everyone to give them our senior will. It wasn't ready on Monday at our last meeting which was kind of a bummer, but we are just meeting tonight really quick. It makes me really sad to know that my time in the house ended like this. I wish I could stay active next semester, but student teaching combined with my undiagnosed ADHD, it just would not work out for me. It really is a bummer because a lot of the problems will go away after this semester is over and I think the chapter will function much better as a whole. I told Kate I would be around to help with recruitment for sure, because there is still a lot I can do as an alumnae member and a lot of questions I can answer for her. I am happy about that at least because I love these girls so much, I am so glad I joined because I met some of the people I consider to be among my closest friends. I mean, who did I drive 9 hours with to Crawfordsville, Indiana with? Meggles of course, our lovely and amazing president. Who do I stand in the pouring rain with for 20 minutes to talk to about nothing in particular? Crazy Pam, who is my girl from Minnesota. Who's sarcasm cracks me up and has me in tears laughing so hard? JV, by far, is one of the funniest people I know, and the most intelligent. And then there's Kate, what can I really say about Kate, except she's, well, she's Kate. You just have to know her.

I think reading Teetz's blog turned me into an emotional pansy too. Damnit.

Days til Teetz is legal: 49

All sorts of nothing

For the record, I did not 'profess my love' to Teetz's brother, as Teetz claims I did. I merely talked to him on the phone for twenty minutes and he proclaimed his life for me FOUR DIFFERENT times. Of course, the reasons he said he loved me were for typical drunken reasons such as: A. I said I was blunt and like to say things for shock value; B. I want to get Teetz wasted on his 21st birthday; C. Just because; and D. I can't remember why. Apparently Teetz also talked to Chaz last night and while he kind of remembers talking to me he doesn't remember much at all from the night, however Teetz actually said that if Chaz could just make out with me, that would be great. Teetz is very very in trouble. But hey, if all this nonsense means just once I get to make out with his hott brother, then sweet for me.

I am moving out of the dorms finally, and everything should be okay. I wish I could afford to live by myself because I'd much rather do that, but until I have a grown-up job, I'm stuck. Even the places Teetz looked at for the summer are like, $450 and that's just for an efficiency, I'd have to be without cable, Internet and once in a while probably electricity just to pay rent. Ah well, I can survive a year.

There is absolutely nothing else of great importance going on right now. I am done with classes this week because I don't have any finals. I can't believe my senior year is ending so quietly. Last night we had Senior Send-Off and JV wrote me the most hilarious prophecy, I had the best one, by far. However, I am also the only senior some of them actually like, so...Anyway.

That really is about it. I have my Bios 295 final tomorrow which, rumor has it, we're making ice cream. Not 100% sure, but I don't think any final we have can be too tough.

Also, I reread that stuff I wrote after I brought Teetz's drunk ass back from Jake's Saturday night/Sunday morning. After thinking about it a lot more, I realize the last statement was false. At first it really did suck and I was upset because I never thought I would have the guts to tell this guy that I couldn't be friends with him anymore. I am glad I did though, because he never really cared about me and if he did, things would have gone a lot differently between us. It's okay though, I am better and stronger for doing what I did and I am glad it is over. There's a line in the book, "He's Just Not That Into You" that the author says when choosing friends I prefer the ones who don't make me cry myself to sleep at night. Things were never that bad but the sentiment is the same. I want friends who will be there for me when I need them, not when they have a spare moment and luckily, I have them. I don't know what I would do without them in fact, so for those of you reading this I know I don't say it enough: thanks

Days til Teetz is legal: 50

Update

I suppose I should update this thing every once in a while, yet I still seem to have a difficult time justifying even having a blog though I am strangely compelled to continue typing.

So, an update.

Formal is on Saturday, my last ever as an active member of Alpha Delta Pi. I am not sure how I feel about that and I certainly won't discuss it here in a public forum, but there are definitely mixed emotions. And I always figured Adam would be there to take me, it's what we planned on since last Fall, even before the last Formal. I am not sure why, but right now I am having a much more difficult time dealing with the fact that he is gone. I think it's because June is getting that much closer now and he will be going to Iraq in less than 3 months. I know it is something he felt he had to do and something he strongly believes in, he wouldn't be in the Guard if it wasn't. But at the same time, if anything ever happened to him...Let's just not think about that or the water-works will probably start again.

Stuff that doesn't make me sad that I can talk about:
VOICE LESSONS are going great. I am really happy I started them. I will never be a great singer, but at least I have a little more confidence now. I found out yesterday I have a pretty good range and Emily was so happy with the progress that was made just from last week to this week. I wish our schedules meshed better so we could meet more than once a week, but who knows, hopefully I will be able to continue them this summer and we can also figure out something for the fall. I actually sang 'Amazing Grace' (not an easy song, mind you) and hit the notes and actually had the right pitch. It's always a great feeling to discover something in you that you never knew you had.

Bret Michaels. Sideways. (If you don't get it, you weren't meant to, haha)

Also, last night Teetz and I were watching The Day After Tomorrow and I discovered that no matter how hard I try, I can't not talk to the characters. I tried really hard to not talk, but all that happened was they didn't listen to me when I did tell them what was going to happen or that they were stupid or pointless, and Teetz got annoyed. I think from now on we can probably only watch movies together that I haven't seen.